There was an old woman who lived in a shoe
Whose clutter of brats numbered forty and two.
She'd never got money for buying them bread,
Was forced into sleeping them 7 to a bed.
Afraid for her brood and fed up with the strife,
She set out to find them a cosy new life.
O'er mountains and oceans - begged, borrowed and stole -
Now they're all sitting pretty - in Staines - on the dole.
It takes a certain natural beauty to sit pretty in stains I suppose
ReplyDeleteI'm sure I don't know what you mean. I do it all the time! And ever since I increased my portfolio in Tena Ladycare Products, I've been sitting even prettier! - I am sorry, that truly was disgusting, but then if you wanted class - you're in the wrong place!
ReplyDeleteoh Jeremy Kyle-tastice madam...
ReplyDeleteYou can almost see them, can't you. "Ma boyfriend ain't your baby's farver!".
ReplyDeleteI was afraid you were going to get autobiographical there, but then realised I'd only had five children and it just felt like forty and two!!
ReplyDeleteI bet the youngest is two and already on the cider...and fags....and betting on the gee-gees.
ReplyDelete