Friday, 18 September 2009
I couldn't resist having another go at these, as they are just too good to pass by:
On a church notice board: "Prepare to meet thy God" to which someone had added "evening dress optional"
"Racial prejudice is a pigment of the imagination"
"Roget's Thesaurus dominates, regulates, rules, OK, alright, adequately"
"Blow your mind - smoke dynamite!"
"Celibacy is not an inherited characteristic"
"Sudden prayers make God jump"
Outside a farmer's gate "FREE ACCESS" with a little note underneath "Until the Bull charges"
On a car park pay & display board "God isn't dead - He just couldn't find anywhere to park"
Condom machines seem to provide the best ones, such as ...
"Not for sale during French postal strike"
"The worst chewing gum I ever tasted"
"Subject to VAT if used on the premises"
"Buy me and stop one"
"Buy two - get one jump ahead"
To the question "Is there any intelligent life on earth?" someone had written "No. I'm only visiting"
Outside London's Smithfield Livestock Market "DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS" with the small print "They're all dead"
"Education kills by degrees"
"Don't let the goverment stop hire education"
"BILL STICKERS WILL BE PROSECUTED" .... "Bill Stickers is innocent"
On a University notice board "LECTURE THIS EVENING ON SCHIZOPHRENIA" to which a student had added "I've half a mind to go" before another added "I'm in two minds myself"
"THE FUTURE IS FEMALE" "Unreliable, full of broken promises, pretty to look at, but horrible to face"
Written at the very top of a urinal wall "If you can aim this far, you should be in the Fire Brigade"
"DYSLEXIA LURES, KO"
"I'm a fairy. My name is Nuff. Fairy Nuff"
On the wall of a Datsun dealership "Buy Blitish"
"I thought clap was a form of applause until I discovered Smirnoff"
"It's no good looking for a joke. There's one in your hand" on the inside wall of Gents toilet
And on another one "Christine. If you're reading this. We're through"
"Last Tuesday's meeting of the Apathy committee has just been canceled"
"Be alert" "Your country needs lerts"
And last, but not least, my favourite sickie ... "Texans are living proof that Indians screwed Buffaloes".
I've got to stop here, otherwise I'll be going all night!
PS: Click on the photo at the top of this post, to see an enlarged view. It's really quite a clever one (painted on 'the wall' in Palestine by a Bristol based Graffiti Artist called Banksy. It's really worth just typing his name into Google Images to get an idea of what he does. His work comes in different shades of thought provoking, political, outrageous, very funny and downright wicked. It's also a lot cheaper than buying one of his books!